Fabienne Fredrickson

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Your friends and family just don’t GET you, do they?

I’m thrilled to introduce you to one of our standout students of The Leveraged Business Business School™, Love and Passion Coach Stacey Martino. Please welcome Stacey as our first guest contributor to the The Leveraged Business blog. As always, we’d love to hear your feedback. Please post your comments and questions below. ~ Fabienne. Connect with Stacey on Facebook here.

Stacey MartinoEver come back from a phenomenal personal development event or program and feel like “no one in my regular life gets me?”

I’ve spent the last two decades in the personal development field and coached countless people who are on the path of personal development.  One thing I’ve noticed, repeatedly, was the struggle that people on the personal development path had assimilating back into the “muggle world” (as Fabienne so perfectly named it).

I noticed a pattern as people came back into their every-day life, where one of two things would happen.  Either they would spew unwanted personal development stuff all over the people around them, or worse, they would go back to playing small so as not to alienate the people close to them.

This breaks my heart.  So, I created a tool to help my clients maintain their long lasting breakthroughs AND cultivate their personal relationships at the same time! Because YES, you can have it all!!

When your relationships are not where you want them to be it impacts every area of your life… your confidence, your self-worth and your happiness. (Click here to tweet this.)

First, let me explain, that there are two groups of people in your life today.

The first group consists of the people in your life who GROW with you. They hold you to a higher standard, challenge you to be the best version of yourself and will reach out and pull you up to your next level.

The other group of people in your life is your friends and family.  They are the people who love you and have known you the longest.  They are NOT on the personal development path right now.

Pain happens when you interact with your friends and family, as if they are part of that first group (those who grow with you) and you share your growth and development work with them. I understand.  It’s not easy to watch the people in your life suffer when you know you have a distinction that can help them.

But what you are missing is the flip-side of that interaction.  It’s also painful for your friends and family.

While you are coming from the most loving of intentions, when you offer unwanted personal growth, what your friends and family actually hear is “I guess you don’t think I’m good enough the way I am.”

They feel rejected.

So you both end up feeling bad.  And the relationship gets strained.  This is where too many people, end up distancing themselves from people they just don’t know how to “be” with.

I created a tool called Right Hand/Left Hand to help my clients integrate long lasting change into their lives in a way that enhances their personal relationships too! Here’s how it works:

Put your hands out in front of you, palms up.

In your left hand is the people you grow with.  When you are in your Left Hand, you get support, validation, growth and personal development.

In your right hand is your Friends and Family.  You only go to your right hand to GIVE!  GIVE unconditional love and compassion to each and every one of them! You are a force for good in their lives!

You go to your left hand to GET, and out of that growth, YOU have the potential to GIVE unconditionally to your friends and family!

Left Hand = You go to GROW

Right Hand = You go to GIVE

Most people will go through their entire lives never having anyone give them unconditional love and compassion for exactly who they are.  You have the ability within you to be that person for your friends and family!  Don’t sell yourself short and distance yourself.  Step in!

How does this relate to your relationships—both personal and professional?  When your relationships are not where you want them to be it impacts every area of your life… your confidence, your self-worth and your happiness.

As a love and passion relationship expert, I help my clients to reignite the passion and create rock solid alignment with their partner.

When you are creating transformation in your intimate relationship, measuring what you are GETTING back will actually block the progress that you desire.  During the transformation process, you need to GIVE unconditionally to your partner!

It is during this time, when you are creating your magnificent love affair that you must put your partner into your Right Hand, with your friends and family.  Give them unconditional love!

And that is the key to constantly growing and developing while enhancing the relationships in your life—so you can be the best version of yourself and have the greatest relationships with the people you love too!

cropheadshotstaceyStacey & Paul Martino are the founders of LoveAndPassionCoach.com and the creators of the Relationship Transformation System™, the proven step-by-step Relationship Transformation program helping people all around the world create their unshakable love and unleashed passion that lasts a lifetime!

With nearly two decades in personal development, Stacey is trained and certified as a Marriage Educator and Divorce Preventionist by Tony Robbins of Robbins Madanes.  Start creating your magnificent love affair today, click here to get your free audio program How to Transform Your Relationship in Eight Steps.

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